#there was something else i wanted to add but i forgot

[moon-ttokki-x]

oh my god I’m stupid I requested 8, 9, and 39 for the SKZ prompt list but I forgot to ask for which member. Bangchan pretty please 🥺👉👈

hihi this took so long sorry >< . . . this is a lot more angsty than anticipated but i hope it works. i wrote it a little differently that i normally would, but here you go, love~~

stupidly perfect - (best friend!bang chan x reader)

pairing: bang chan x reader

summary: chan has never noticed how you feel for him, and one fateful evening, you let it all spill.

genre: angsty as hell, idol!au, reader lowkey enters their villain era, mentions of eating and drinking, overexcited maknaes, chan is kinda oblivious in this fic ngl, supportive felix, itzy mentions (yeji, ryujin, chaeryoung if that counts ig), this is super sad tbh

a/n: this took a while tbh . . . div by @ferretmilkshakezzz

⛓️ prompts: 8. "Take your time. I'm not going anywhere." / 9. "You can rest now." / 39. "I can't keep pretending I'm fine."

skz masterlist | skz prompt list

"Y/n, do you wanna come to that ramen restaurant with us later?" Jisung tugs at your arm, skipping alongside you. "We've been wanting to go for ages, and we all finally have schedules off tonight."

"Yeah, come with us," Jeongin adds. "It'll be fun."

The maknaes are tagging all around you as you walk down the hallway, trying your best to keep a hold on all the papers you're carrying. It's difficult when they're fluttering around you like overexcited birds.

You'd taken the job at JYPE around four months ago; it was decided after a very long period of doubting and worrying that it wouldn't work out after what happened at your last workplace. But your best friend, Chan, had been super supportive throughout the whole thing, even offering to help you move into your little apartment down the road from the company. He'd brought some of his friends to help with the heavy lifting, and from there, you'd pretty much been adopted into the group he'd formed and was the leader of.

Not like you had a choice in the first place.

But you didn't mind; you'd been worried partly because of the fact that you wouldn't have any friends when you'd moved to this part of Korea; Chan had managed to inadvertently solve that issue without trying. Now, the four excitable boys skipped and bickered around you as you set down the papers on your office desk. Wiping the minimal sweat from your forehead, you sighed and pried Seungmin away from the trinkets neatly lining your bookshelf.

"Who else is going?" You ask as Jisung whines about you coming to the restaurant for the umpteenth time.

Seungmin shrugs, interrupting his friend. "All of the members, you, and a couple of the girls from our dance crew."

You feel your heart sink just as your brain tells you to agree; it's been ages since you went out with the guys, and you honestly couldn't wait for a break. Work was always stressful around comeback season, but you'd all settled into the rhythm of it soon enough. Spending an evening out with eight of your best friends eating some soul food sounded like a good idea. A better idea than spending the evening on the couch in your apartment, eating ice cream in complete silence. Alone.

You bite your lip, anticipating. "Which of the dance crew girls?"

Jeongin shrugs from the sofa, swinging his legs over a disgusted Seungmin's lap as he lounges back. "The usuals; Yeji, Ryujin, Young-hee, and Chae. Why?"

"No reason," you say, turning back to the bookshelf to unnecessarily reorganise something, fiddling with the solid fabric spine of one of your books. "I'll let you know if I'm coming. Now, clear out."

Your last comment doesn't bother the maknaes at all; they know you don't like your office being messed up, so they call goodbyes, and Jisung sneakily pokes your side as he filters out the door. Felix, however, remains.

You try to ignore the sinking feeling in your chest and keep a neutral expression as you turn the dark-haired boy. He looks so different from his usual blonde-haired countenance; however, no less beautiful, and not for the first time do you hold yourself back from carding your fingers affectionately through his hair.

You exhale. "Do you need something, Lix?"

He sits down on your chair, swinging it backwards and leaning his forearms across the back. An air of resignation flows around him. "You're not coming tonight, are you?"

You bite your lip. "I'll see."

His voice is quiet. "You've said that since Chae started hanging around us. Is it because of her?"

You scoff, dropping a pen. "No. Why would you think that?"

Felix leans forward on the chair, nosy. "It is because of her, isn't it? Do you not like her? Is it because of Chan-hyung?"

You whip around to face him, exasperated. The explanation bubbles out of you like molten lava from a temperamental volcano. "Okay, fine! I just- I can't stand seeing her around him. They're so close, and they always seem so wrapped up in each other-"

You cut yourself off then, not wanting to say anything you might regret. Chae is nice enough; she's never done anything explicitly hurtful towards you, though you secretly have suspicions that she doesn't like you at all. But you stay quiet, trying to dissipate the rising frustration blooming in your chest.

Felix is quiet.

You know he knows; he's known for ages about your little crush on his leader. You were afraid to tell him, once upon a time; but all you got in response from the affectionate chicken boy was a hushed giggle and a gentle encouragement to tell Chan how you feel. He hasn't told anyone else about your feelings, and you know he would continue to keep his mouth shut. But you wish, even just a little, that someone else would notice and find a way to get Chae away from your best friend.

"No wonder she likes him too," you say quietly to yourself, sinking into your office chair.

And it isn't a wonder, really. Chan is sweet, and gentle, and kind, and so, so, supportive and admirable. There's not a single flaw about him, except perhaps his slight dislike towards himself and his irritation when it comes to those soft, dark curls that frame his perfect face so perfectly-

You shake yourself out of it. Felix is still looking at you quietly, his head tilted in thought.

"You do know," he says carefully, "that you're closer with Chan that Chae is?"

"But still," you groan. "He always seems so much happier around her, and he always only talks to her when you all go out-"

"How would you know?" Felix cries, throwing his hands up. "You're not even there half the time, and Chan only talks to her because you're not there for him to talk to. He has to settle for her because he's fed up of us, and he's not close with Yeji, Ryujin, or Young-hee."

You sigh and hop up onto the desk, swinging your legs over the side. "I just can't stand it, Lix. Seeing them together..."

His expression softens. "I know, Y/n, and I know how frustrated you get when they're all over each other, but you have to at least try. Come with us. If not for him, then for us. We miss you."

"I'm right here."

Felix sighs softly. "That's not what I meant."

You rub two fingers along the bridge of your nose, trying to think straight. You can't get the images out of your mind; Chan and Chae giggling to each other, her touching his arm, him reciprocating the affection... no one said it would hurt this bad when you watch your best friend fall for someone else.

No one said it would hurt this much when you realise that you're in love with said best friend either.

"I can't keep pretending I'm fine," you say, so softly you're not sure Felix hears it. But he does.

"Then don't pretend," he urges gently. "Get him to fall for you. You're halfway there already, I'm pretty sure. But it's not gonna happen if you're always at a distance from him."

He has a point, you think. But, being as stubborn as you are, there's still that nagging doubt in the back of your mind that Chan will never feel the same way that you do, whether you're with him or not-

"Y/n," Felix says, a little more firmly.

You know exactly what he's thinking; sighing, and then bending down to pick up the pen you dropped earlier, you slot it back into the holder on the desk.

"Fine," you say quietly, trying and failing to hide the tiny smile twitching at the corners of your mouth. "I'll come."

Felix lets out a whoop.

.

You pull your jacket a little closer around yourself as you head round the corner, the evening wind whipping your hair into a state of extreme disarray. Sighing and then spluttering as you pull strands of it out of your mouth and eyes, you duck around people and head to the restaurant, its warm, golden light drawing you in like a moth to a flame.

You're not late, so to speak; you spot the group sitting at a large corner booth with comfy seats, mingling and chattering, and you notice Felix immediately. His face lights up when he sees you, half with relief and half with something else you can't quite decipher. He makes to get up before you're almost tackled to the floor by Jisung and Jeongin, who are pretty much hollering at the top of their lungs.

Minho shushes them insistently as he tugs them off you, bowing before shoving both maknaes back into their seats.

"Y/n," Jeongin says happily. "We didn't think you'd come."

You chuckle awkwardly and settle into the spot next to Felix, trying not to look around for Chan like you always do. "Yeah, I needed a break. Besides, you two would have come for my throat if I turned the invitation down one more time."

"Damn right," Jisung interjects, all three of you dissolving into giggles.

You look around then; not everyone is here. Hyunjin and Yeji are still missing, both Hwangs late as per usual, and you know Changbin will come by a little later, having decided to work out before treating himself for the evening. You make a mental note to stick to your work ethic as well as he does, but it's interrupted by the familiar tone of someone speaking your name.

"You look nice, Y/n," Chan says from next to Felix, who is sitting in between both of you.

Chae is sitting next to Chan, you notice with some sadness and displeasure; her long, pinky-blonde hair is straight and neat, long acrylic nails coming up to brush strands of it off her perfect porcelain cheeks, flushed with the cold. At least, you hope it's the cold and not the effect of Chan's probably flirting before you arrived.

Despite the indignance rising in your stomach, you can't help but notice how Chan looks tonight; his hair is slightly damp from the chilly weather outside, the adorably messy strands of it curling against his temples and nape. His eyes are crescents as he gazes into yours, and you fight the urge to reach over and wipe the faint remainder of strawberry milk off the curve of his plush bottom lip.

You know exactly where he'd bought the little drink carton of it from; there's a vending machine just down the street, one that the boys always buy drinks from before eating out. It was their tradition, and one that you gladly partook in, that is before you became too shy to be around the boys.

Because of Chan and his stupid perfectness.

You suddenly come back down to earth and realise that Chan is still gazing at you; Chae is laughing obnoxiously loud in the background behind him, no doubt to recapture his attention, but all you can focus on is the fact that you're locking eyes with the most beautiful person on earth. And also the fact that you haven't replied to his little indirect compliment, so you just nod and turn back to the table to fiddle with the menu in front of you.

Felix exhales discreetly and you fight a grin, watching as he unpeels himself from the corner of the table. He'd been bending over it so you could lean back to talk to Chan, and he pokes you affectionately in the side as you thank him quietly, clearing your throat in an attempt to get rid of the flush painting your cheeks.

"Could've warned me about how pretty he looks," you mutter to Felix under your breath. He just chuckles and touches your knee as everyone begins to order.

The food arrives just as Hyunjin, Yeji, and Changbin make their dramatically late entrance; they clatter noisily into their seats, and you bump fists with Yeji just as everyone begins to dig in.

There's brief silence as everyone begins to fill their stomachs with soul food, and then the chatter eventually rises again as the members turn to each other to bicker and laugh. You almost snort a noodle out of your mouth as you watch Hyunjin take a hairclip out of his bag to clip his hair back, before realising it's not there. Seungmin, sitting next to him, runs his hand through the boy's kiwi-like hair before turning back to his ramen.

You almost start to enjoy yourself, but there's still that lingering tension that you feel rests in the air between you and Chan; if anyone else has noticed it, they're not saying anything. Felix, noticing your quietness, tries to fill the space between you with small talk and jokes, but it doesn't seem to help. Once or twice, he even brings Chan into the conversation in a bid to try and get you two to converse, but Chae interjects more and more frequently until you quietly tell Felix to stop.

You feel bad because of it; you know he's just trying to help, but it isn't working. And it's beginning to make you feel worse, the fact that it seems not even the dark-haired sunshine boy can get his leader to try and talk to you. And you realise, all of a sudden, that maybe it's not Chan that's the problem.

There are two possible reasons that Chan doesn't seem to want to talk to you; you thought maybe he would talk more with you tonight, considering it's been so long since you've been out with them, but you're crestfallen as you realise that not more than a few words have been exchanged between the two of you tonight.

And it strangely breaks your heart.

The other reason is that Chae might have been badmouthing you behind your back to Chan, or it could be because of the fact that Chan genuinely likes her. You're not sure, but that belief is confirmed as you look across to see Chan holding out his chopsticks to her, bringing a piece of tempura to her perfect, pink lips.

Watching in horror and completely forgetting about the cooling ramen in front of you, you watch as Chae accepts the tempura with a little giggle, batting her lashes at Chan as he reaches up to wipe a crumb off her lip. The sight is so equally disgusting and upsetting that you immediately stand up, moving out of the booth as tears blur your eyes.

"Where are you going?" Jisung calls after you, Felix looking up from his food.

"Bathroom," you call over your shoulder, your voice surprisingly strong considering the fact that tears and beginning to stream down your cheeks.

Not wanting to make a fuss or arouse suspicion from the group, you do actually head to the bathrooms, locking the cubicle door behind you and sinking down against the door. You couldn't care less if it's dirty right now, the only thought in your head the mental image of your best friend and Chae giggling and flirting all over each other, blissfully unaware of your misery.

It's not fair.

"Maybe it's me," you whisper to yourself, sniffling as you rip off a piece of toilet paper, scrubbing at your face. You feel so pathetic and unworthy; what kind of person hides out in the bathroom crying over a guy who probably doesn't even care about them?

Standing up and checking you have your phone and wallet, you sigh as you feel the weight of them in your pockets. Good. You can just leave without having to go back to the table. The last thing you want right now is to talk to anyone, or have to put up a fake cheerful front.

Heading to the back of the restaurant, the once-inviting golden lights now feeling like a spotlight, you emerge out into the street, the cold wind soothing the hot, sticky tear irritation on your cheeks. You head to the parking garage down the street and try to walk as quickly as you can past the opening of the ramen restaurant, lest any of the group notice you walking away.

And they don't, not least until you cross the street and head down the dimly light footpath.

Someone grabs your wrist suddenly and you cry out, whipping your head back so fast to see who it is you think you might have whiplash.

Chan is standing there, his hand solid and warm around your wrist, the wind ruffling his dark hair back from his bare face. You can see the glint of his silver earrings under the streetlights.

"Wait," he pants. "Where are you going?"

You can't fight the hot, wet tear rolling down your cheek and inwardly curse it for escaping. "Home."

"Why?" He asks, concern and worry painting his expression. "Are you not feeling well?"

You fight the urge to slap him; it wouldn't be fair, however much you want to do it. He just doesn't understand. He doesn't understand any of it. And you want nothing more to run into his arms and spill all your thoughts and feelings like you have so many times before, but you can't.

Not this time.

You can't tell Chan that you've loved him since who knows how long; that seeing him makes your heart feel lighter, the way a high schooler might feel seeing their crush in the sunny hallways. You can't tell him how many times you styled your hair to look a little like his, hoping the curls that make him look so handsome might make you a little more attractive too. You can't tell him how many times you ran late for schedules just because you took a detour to his studio to talk with him, even if it was just for a minute.

Even if all of it was a waste in the end. Because he likes someone else, and that someone else isn't you.

So you just shake your head as the tears come streaming down, and rip your wrist out of his grip before turning and walking away. The earth feels like it's shattering around you.

Or maybe that's just your heart.

But Chan doesn't give up; you hear his footsteps continue behind you, hurried and irregular, like he's trying to decide whether to let you go or make you stay.

"Y/n," he pants. "Wait, just- will you stop walking so fast? Please, wait, slow down- What's wrong?"

"Everything's wrong!" You cry out, turning to face him as you throw your hands up. A sob rips through your lungs, face contorting with the force of your tears. "Okay? Everything's wrong."

Chan is silent, one hand out in an unsteady attempt to calm you. "What are you talking about? You're worrying me."

You scoff and kick a stone across the footpath, harshly rubbing a hand across your cheekbone.

"Y/n, please," he pleads, his voice quieter. "Felix noticed you were gone for too long earlier, and I saw you walking out of the restaurant. Please, tell me what's wrong. You look so upset."

"Then stop looking."

He recoils, looking slightly hurt, before it's overtaken by a look of determination. You know that look; it either results in an all-nighter to finish a song track, an attempt to wrangle seven naughty kids, or a hard-to-have conversation. You know it's the last one.

"Please," he says, even quieter. "Tell me what's wrong. Take your time. I'm not going anywhere."

"It's you," you say, broken with utter resignation.

He takes a step forward. "What?"

"It's you," you repeat, looking away as another hysterical sob brings the wind inside your body. It's sharp and biting, and it brings back some of your courage. But only some.

You raise your eyes to look at him. Maybe this is the last conversation you'll have with Chan, before he decides he doesn't want to be around someone who's in a one-way love story with him. Even if that person is his best friend.

"You don't realise, do you?" You whisper brokenly. "You never realised I was in love with you, Chan. But that's just who you are. You may be kind and compassionate and intuitive, but you never realised why I do what I do, or why I act the way I act around you."

His face is contorted in utter disbelief; whether it's from shock or disgust, you don't want to know.

"I realised around the time you helped me move in," you continue. Might as well get all of it out now. "I looked at you differently after a while. I didn't see my best friend anymore. I saw someone else, someone stronger and more clever and more dedicated and more perfect and flawless. And it was strange, because I realised that you changed so much. Maybe I changed too, but it was different seeing you walking around at the company and going about your schedules, because I felt different about it all. I felt different about you. And I couldn't let it go, not least when we actually talked. I used to be late for most of my meetings and events because I would take detours to see you. Some days I would think about canceling my schedules just so I could be around you more.

"And I love the boys, I do, Chan. So much. But I have to admit, I wouldn't be around them half as much if you weren't there. I felt so drawn to you, not like the way I did when we were friends. I figured that if I didn't want to lose you, I would have to discipline myself. So I did.

"I threw myself into my work; I gave myself so much to do, partially to distract myself, partially to use work as an excuse whenever I was invited out, like tonight. Just because I knew you would be there, and I didn't want to end up spilling it all to you, because I knew it would ruin everything between us. Forever.

"And when Chae started hanging around us, I didn't mind at first; I sort of liked her. But I started hating her because of how close she would get to you, how much you two would secretly talk between yourselves, and it made me upset. So I ended up spending much more time by myself so that I would be able to forget she existed. So that I could forget that she ever entered the picture, and that it was just me and my secret that I kept from you. For so long, Chan. You have no idea how much I had to hold myself back from you.

"Did you assume that I never wanted to go out with you guys? That I never wanted to buy drinks from that vending machine the members always go to before eating out, or that I didn't want to spend time with you? Because I did, Chan. But I forced myself not to, because I couldn't bear to see you, and most of the time I didn't know if Chae was going to be there. I told myself I wasn't going to sit there and watch you be with her, not while I felt so invisible and unseen around you.

"Let me tell you something, Chan," you choke through sobs at him, pointing a finger at his chest as though it were a gun. "Every time Jisung or Jeongin or one of the boys invited me out, I did actually show up. Even if you never saw me. I would watch from a distance to see if Chae was with you; if she was, I would turn around and leave, and go home. If not, I would smile from around the corner as the maknaes begged you for money to buy drinks from that vending machine. And then I would turn around and go home anyway.

"I know every single one of their preferences; even if you didn't know I was there to observe them bickering and choosing, faces lit by streetlight. I would go around to the vending machines at the company and randomly buy their favourites for them, even if you didn't know how I knew. I would buy them for you too, and debate leaving a little note for you telling you how I felt alongside it, and I never did.

"Because, despite all of that, it was all a waste," you snap at him. You're not sure why you're angry; you suppose it's the result of feeling unheard for so long. "It was a waste, Chan. Because you never even noticed how I felt. So don't come chasing after me in the night like this like you care, because it was Felix who told you to come after me, Felix who noticed I had been gone for too long, not you of your own accord. And don't look worried or concerned either, because I've told you what's wrong, Chan, just as you asked. You can rest now."

You can barely see him through the blur of your tears.

"Y/n," he whispers, broken as you feel. "I'm so sorry."

"I don't care," you cry out at him, turning and storming in the other direction. And this time, he doesn't follow, still standing under the streetlight with his hand out, though you're not there to take it.

You sob bitterly as you almost flee around the corner, breaking out into a full-on run, like sprinting can fix the problem, fix your heart and your tears. It doesn't, however, and you feel worse as you bolt pass the crossing light, not caring about its colour. Later you will realise that running with blurry vision and a hysterical, heartbroken mindset was not the wisest idea.

You don't see the car speeding towards you until it's too late.

a/n: *laughs in writer*

[ashoss]

the only woman ever actually

design ramblings below

plus a blackfire and starfire side by side i might ramble in the tags

[i-will-post-whatever]

Also when approaching the motherlobe Raz says Maligula looks familiar which is some foreshadowing but then he immediately redirects to, 'she looks familiar because I saw her in true psychic tales.' Which kind of plants some suspicion in the players mind and is seen as obvious foreshadowing for replays. I love the way they show you levitation, with Raz falling and Milla coming to remind him of what he's learned. Another thing I love is how they show Razs' fear of water by having him dive head first, of course the better graphics and facial expressions set this up but the hand of Galochio really confirms it. Setting up the tutorial in a mind is great because it shows right away what the game is about. When I first played psychonauts 1 I was very confused about what psychonauts even were and I was surprised when you actually went into the coaches mind. It helps that you have psychic powers when you start since in the first game I was confused when Milla, Sasha, and the Coach try to catch Raz. I didnt understand that they had psychic powers until i got pyrokenesis and saw sasha using psi blast. For new players it establishes that Raz and others are psychic and for old players its familiar and doesnt feel like we're starting with nothing. Psychonauts 2 doesn't leave any time for you to be confused but also explains things quickly and clearly while leaving suspense. I could be biased since I played the first game and I already have the knowledge.

Why Loboto's Labyrinth is a Brilliant Tutorial Level

Psychonauts 2 has an amazing opening. The point of a tutorial level and introduction is to establish the game's setting, characters, rules, tone, and story, and Loboto's Labyrinth does this brilliantly in various ways.

To establish the setting they chose to have us thrown immediately into the mind of one of its characters, though at first have us believe that we are in Psychonauts HQ. Having the first part of the level be just a boring office layout sets up our expectations for what Psychonauts HQ looks like, so when we actually get to the Motherlobe and see it for ourselves, it's just as amazing and fantastical as it is for Raz. Having the first area we play in be a mind is also a good choice I'd say, as it gives the game time to properly establish just how crazy this game is going to get and how weird it will be.

They give you time to interact with the characters around you, allowing you to get a feel for the writing and the tone the game is going for. Given that this man kidnapped your girlfriend's father, they still take the time to give him a light of sympathy, showing that this is a game about understanding. Milla especially hammers this point home with her insistence that they need to help Loboto.

Given that it's a tutorial level as well, they also establish the rules of both the game and the world around them in a linear but straightforward fashion that doesn't feel hand-holdy. The reasoning for the abilities to come up makes sense and feels natural, so if you're a new player you get introduced to them naturally, and if you're an old player you can quickly get into the swing of things.

And even this level, which is mostly just here to be a tutorial, also serves the story super well. The themes of trying to keep quiet that permeate throughout the level are fascinating. The dental doors that are literally mouths that are zipped shut, the posters around the place telling Loboto to keep quiet, and the sections where Loboto does dentistry work on himself because you literally cannot talk while someone does dentistry work on you. There's even foreshadowing to the end of the game, with the figment of Truman's Case that can be found in the Trap AND the chandelier resembling Gristol's crown that hangs above the Loboto poster in that same room by the time you get to Lili's section.

Loboto's Labyrinth is an excellent way to start off Psychonauts 2. It's an excellent level, with an excellent story and themes, and an excellent setup and payoff for later down the line.

Join me in the possible future for a breakdown of Hollis's Mind and why Hollis could be so much more of a deeper character than the game allows her to be.

[alevolpe]

do you think queen Serenity was a good mother or not really?

I mean.. kinda. Depends on your definition of "good mother". If one doesn't necessarily need to be a good person to be a good mother, then yes, I'd say she was an ok mother, if a busy and a bit of an apathetic one.

Everything considered, I think she did love her daughter. She had to understand that all that she is and owns will be passed down to her and that itself does require a level of trust and love toward the other party.

Now, was she an outright, very loving and supportive parent? No. Her and Princess Serenity would often fall under the "you have to grow up and follow your duties" type of conversation, which itself would be perfectly normal for a parent/child, but QS lack of understanding or even empathy toward her daughter's situation would often end up with one party having the only say.

Queen Serenity is not only her mother but the queen, she owned her daughter in the most literal sense and if you ask me, that is a quite toxic environment for a child. She embodied very much the old school parenting style.

[crustyfloor]

Finally finished filling in my bingo board but I didn't have enough boxes

template by @/LyritArt

[charlieslimeciclereal]

criminally low number considering the amount of thumbnails they're... um.. featured in. together.

[saintedbythestorm]

Used that timed trial thing on dragon age veilguard today... and oh boy... 😬

I see every single one of my fears about the game was sadly... true. I am already annoyed by some of the dialog, I absolutely DESPISE that combat (and here I thought inquisitions combat was a pain in the ass...) and I just... cannot for the life of me get into it.

I can't really fully put my finger on what it is (may be a lot of small things, would explain why I can't pinpoint it) but I just... keep waiting for something to hook me, the way dragon age always has before. But I'm getting nothing. So far it does feel too focused on the combat, while combat is boring and quite frankly poorly made.

For example, I remember this early Ogre fight, in a super tight room, where they clearly wanted you to like dodge all the time (WHAT IS WITH ALL THE DODGING?!) and there was like no space to do anything. I was battling the camera more than the ogre. It's like they forgot they got ranged based classes or something, I don't know. Hated that fight.

I'm also very angry they baited us with Varric and I've barely seen the man after that intro bit. The hell bioware...

There has also been some... very odd interactions already. Where my character sounds super upset and angry while just standing there like 😶. Like if you're that pissed I'd expect it to be reflected on the body language but it's just...not? To be honest, I feel like most conversations the characters are veeeery stiff. It just feels kinda ... dead? Like they aren't actually taking part.

And that fucking art style... I was sceptical when they first showed it off... got more worried when they showed more... and I was hoping the story and just general feel would help me get past it... but I can't. I REALLY don't like it. I can't put my finger on why, but it's just really not for me. Something something Varrics hair... no I'm still not over it.

I just... I unno. I want to like it. I mean, it's a dragon age game, of course I want to like it but... I can't. And it bloody hurts honestly.

Now I'm gonna go crawl under something and be upset about it for a bit.

[mars-is-me7]

man, i have so many thoughts about qfoolish. he's just a silly little goofy guy but then when you peel away the first layer that you see of him and realize that he's rather a complex character. I feel like he's such a different type of character than what is usually shown. (and honestly, it's something that brings me a lot of comfort as i relate quite heavily to his very laid back nature that people will sometimes take as being unserious or even uncaring) Warning, this gets long (like 2.2k long to be exact) lol and i ramble a lot- also, disclaimer for my own sanity: this is an analysis of the characters! i adore any of the creatures mentioned here so please don't take any of this as a negative view on them! :D

Foolish's motivations are just very different than what typically motivates a character forward and in some sense it's really easy to skew what you think about him. As in, it's really easy to misinterpret his character i think. He express himself in a different way than i think most people are used to. He laughs in serious situations and is constantly just joking around. I think this causes people to think he cant/wont ever be serious, but the thing is that he's perfectly capable of being serious when he needs to be. For example, if he thinks that he and Leo are going into a serious situation, then he tells her to put her armor on. Really, just anything involving Leo he makes sure to be serious if the situation calls for it. Or like, fighting in dungeons only if he deems it dangerous enough to take seriously. but like, if he doesn't think a situation calls for it, then he just continues to be his goofy self. And sometimes when the situation calls for it, he is just in between those two points in a way that others aren't. He's just not afraid to joke around even when the situation seems dire (cellbit's kidnapping and rescue comes to mind. like, he played such a large role with his symmetry wand, but despite all the serious moments going on,, he was still just a goofy guy).

And one thing about him being so silly all the time is that even the other members on the island sometimes get a misconstrued picture of what they think foolish's goal and wants are. I think in some sense it's true to say that what motivates his wants is what the value of something he perceives is. For example, the sunbird he only wanted because of how cool it sounded and how rare it was. The cloud he wants because its something unique and useful. He wants Cucurucho's friendship because that's something no one else has and Cucurucho has access to items and is powerful.

But these wants aren't the most necessarily the most important things to him. Their something he has interest in, yes, but they're not more important than say his friends and family. Which, i feel like some people might not recognize about him. After all, he is constantly talking about wanting a cloud or how he'd have no issue in killing Bad (and holy shit is landduo and their relation something i could go on about for a whole more hour cuz there's so much there)

Because one vital thing that's so *so* important to recognize is that Foolish is very possibly one of the most loyal people on the island. And despite all of his flaws, he would never really want to truly hurt those he cares about. He is loyal to the people he cares about to an absurd amount. I think it's very clear to see his devotion for Vegetta and his adoration for Leo, but his loyalty also applies to his friends on the island. He would never *intentionally* want to harm anyone he cares about. I don't think some people understand that Mr. Mustard fell under that category as someone he cared about. The entire reason Cucurucho was able to lure him into accepting the mission It gave him is because it brought Mr. Mustard's name into the mix. It told Foolish that Pac and Mike were the ones responsible, and with nothing better to do, Foolish set out to complete this task.

To talk more about the recent events with him arresting Tazercraft: he would never truly want to harm or hurt them. However, when you're looking at the grand scheme of how things went down, he was manipulated and really had no other choice. Sure, he seemed to enjoy arresting them at first, but the thing is I don't think he really processed or even thought about how this action would be received by others. To him, arresting Pac and Mike sounded like enough fun, and it was coming from Cucurucho (who he's wanting to be friends with for actual months now, and Cucurucho literally called him friend in the book it handed to him) and being arrested sounded like something he'd enjoy. Again, like something *he'd* enjoy and that he therefore thought Pac and Mike would enjoy.

You have to realize, Foolish doesn't have the same perspective on these serious situations as some others do. And the thing is that he judges how others react based on how he would react to them. So, in that sense, he views being kidnapped/arrested as a good and fun thing! he even said today on stream, "apparently when you arrest someone, others won't find it funny". it might have just been one line, but in my eyes this gives a really clear insight into his character. To him, arresting Pac and Mike was only a positive thing because it would help him find his friend and it could be a fun event for them. His friend that he was told, by cucurucho, that had disappeared because of Pac and Mike. Foolish doesn't hold any ill intent, but that doesn't necessarily come across in others view of him. Although it might not be clear, he cares about Pac and Mike. Today he even expressed worries about them and said that he still considers them his friends (even though he's aware that they might not share those feelings about him anymore). He doesn't know about their past traumas, to him this was just a fun little event that would be fun for both them and him. When first accepting Cucurucho's mission to him, I'd say he doesn't realize the consequences his actions would have. That by arresting Pac and Mike, it'd leave the other members of the server doubting him and mistrusting him. That others would be angry at him for something that he hadn't realized the gravity of.

(just random thing i want to say here: honestly, if Foolish had any malicious intent towards Tazercraft, he could have easily made their arrest go unnoticed for at least a few days. just think about it: if he had said that the surprise he had was just for the two of them. if Jaiden hadn't accompanied them as a witness. people wouldn't of known then what happened to them, but the thing is that he wasn't thinking in this way because he would never seriously want to harm them. he even wanted Jaiden there as a witness)

I think he realized the backlash of his actions in the Favela when everyone seemed to swarm him and then when he got interrogated. In which, he never really lied. All things considered, Foolish is a rather honest guy. I'd even say that he almost never lies. Like, if he's trying to hide the truth about something, he often times will find a way to skirt around the question without lying. Like, just looking at the mess that was the interrogation yesterday (/lh) you can see that he doesn't ever actually lie. He just blabbers a bunch of nonsense and skirts around the issue without ever revealing anything. The issue arises when you look at the lie he did tell.

for those that don't know, Foolish gave Jaiden a rundown of what happened before arresting Tazercraft. and in this he tells her that Cucurucho gave him the option to either 'arrest Pac and Mike' or to 'kill Richarlyson'. Not even going to lie, when he said this is took me (and i think all of stream) off guard. because Foolish practically never lies in that way and so blatantly. because this was just 100% untrue. However, it makes sense why he did it. At that point, he realized that people were going to keep badgering him on why he arrested Pac and Mike, but at the same time he knew they wouldn't take him telling the truth seriously. He may care about Mr. Mustard but the truth is that the other members don't hold those same thoughts towards most the Capybaras in general. Like, just look at Fit's interaction with him today. Foolish literally reiterated the truth of why he did it over and over again, but Fit didn't believe him even slightly. Foolish didn't lie once about his motivations and yet he was just not believed.

I think he realized at some point soon after arresting Pac and Mike that people weren't going to trust the truth. Not from his mouth at least. So he lied to Jaiden because it's a lie that people will easily understand. it's a choice they'd stop questioning him about. Again, he doesn't do this out of malicious intent but because it's something easier for people to understand and relate to. It's something they're not going to hound him about, not like they will when he tells them the truth. This lie is more easily digestible for the island members and it also brings Foolish less stress if they take this and believe it. Everyone is willing to make sacrifices in order to protect the eggs. And he had to of realized that Jaiden was going to tell other people. The islanders almost always spread these types of details to each other, that's just how it goes. Telling this lie to her in secret makes it all that more believable when she goes and tells some of the others about it later cuz it's something Foolish told her in confidentiality. To the other members, it paints foolish only in a good light. Of course he wouldn't have actually wanted to arrest Pac and Mike, he did it to protect Richas! and that's all it takes to stop them from getting angry at him. All things considered, it's a smart move to pull. Although, I do have to wonder how this will come to bite foolish in the butt. Because i can only imagine that it will be revealed eventually, some way or another.

From what i understood, Cellbit immediately dropped his anger on Foolish once he was told it was to protect Richarlyson. When Jaiden tells him this information he doesn't even thing to consider that Foolish could have lied. After all, why reason would anyone have to lie about that? In my mind, i can only imagine that the lie will protect him for now and in the short term, but once revealed that it's a lie, i think there will be some repercussions against Foolish for sure. Like, even Jaiden doesn't know that he's lied. Jaiden, whom he's been telling everything about. Jaiden who is only one (aside from Leo) who now knows of Foolish's secret detective role. Jaiden, whose the one he's told almost the entire truth to.

An interesting thing to note though, is that I think Foolish's decision to lie to Jaiden was still rather spontaneous. like, it's not something he thought too much about. it's a fib that makes his life a little bit easier (a little bit less lonely) and right now it doesn't seem to hold any repercussions. the interesting thing, though, is that he hasn't repeated the lie at any point in time. and like, he also hasn't done any lying to reinforce the lie he's told. it'd be so easy to paint a story that he's being blackmailed, but he just *doesn't* even though it's a lie he's made himself.

Foolish, all in all, is someone that just acts or speaks before really thinking too much about what he's doing. About the possible side affects of his actions. He just *does* them.

I think it also plays in very well with the idea that he's lived for thousands of years. the things that affect the typical mortal just don't phase him in the same way, not when he's viewing everything as an adventure or an element that is fun. i think that also taking into consideration that he's lived for such a long time, it's rather surprising how easy he is to manipulate. Because that is what Cucucrucho is doing, when looking at the whole picture. cucurucho holds a lot of power and we all know that it easily could have arrested Pac and Mike without the intervention of Foolish. So why make him do it anyways?

Well we don't know that for sure, but we can make some guesses. To sow distrust between the members. To see how far Foolish was actually able and willing to go for the Federation. To place blame on someone aside from itself. All possibilities.

Regardless, Foolish has played right into their hands. He's a silly guy that's gotten himself into a serious situation. One in which he might end up having to navigate alone because even though he has Jaiden he's still lied to her, and even though he has Leo, he would never want to put his daughter into harms way. He said something at the end of the stream about how this might just end up being a lonely road he's taking and i couldn't agree more.

Anyways, that's all i got for tonight as it's late and idk what im getting at here, i just think Foolish is really neat and wanted to attempt to put that into words. :D

[someone-always-cares]

chapter 5, page 79

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[image description: an sac webcomic page. "hold on, stay still for a second". rami says, as he puts his hand close to lewis, the angle making him almost look like he's cupping lewis's face, as lewis stares back at him with very wide shining eyes. he then rips off the duct tape off, lewis jolting and making a weird face, the panel borders shaking from the shock, before lewis makes a different face like a grimace or like a cat would make after smelling something foul right before slapping the shit out of it. "sorry. you alright?" rami asks, holding a swiss army knife down near lewis's bound arm, the knife already out. "i- what- i will be? not important. what the fuck are you doing here??". lewis replies. "saving you, apparently. and your friend- sorry i'll get to you in a minute" "no really, why the fuck are you here? how did you find us? why did you come?" lewis says. this last panel is entirely black, aside from the speech bubbles. "you're the one that sent me the location. Is your friend concussed? They're not responding to me. Or you. And are either of you injured in general?" rami responds. "What? I don't think either of us are. And no, she can't hear you, just wave or something. Uh, not with the knife, like a friendly not about to kill you wave, like-" lewis's rambling is interrupted. "It's pitch black in here? Waving won't help?" end id]

edit: a bit late but forgot to mention: next con i have is on june 1st, at animangapop cardiff! feel free to say hi if you're going!

i've always gone back and forth internally if rami's supervision gave him better night vision or not but i'm going to go with yes, it does. lewis also has better night vision on account of his eyes being cat-like. jade has normal human vision unfortunatly. on the bright side (pun not intended), she can make her fingernails glow.

also, thought on book cover? tried a few ideas and this is what i came up with

[id: concept a book cover. mostly sketched, styalised like a corkboard with various photos, pins, ect. the front side (right) has a piece of torn paper with the title and a couple stickers, one star and the other rami's logo. below is a drawing of rami surrounded by eyes. the spine has a strip of washi tape, blue with star patterns, with the title and a "1" at the bottom. the back (right) has a few photos of various panels from chapter 1 and two, a top corner of a missing poster, a business card for iris's ice cream shop, pins of mindforce's eye, and pride pins of the asexual and transgender flags, and lastly a scrap of notebook paper with eye doodles (like iris's eyes), rami's logo, titled "blah blah blah" and placeholder text of the bee movie script opening. red string is scattered around. end id]

note: the panels featured will be redrawn (for the cover. the actual pages will not be) and the one on the front is just a placeholder. not sure what i'll change it to, but something with both rami and lewis.

so, this is fashioned similar to the back of the flyer i use to advertise my comic at conventions, it allows me to show off multiple things, allows me to put in easter eggs and similar, and it feels right, yknow? it looks like the same board i use for story planning, concept art, to do lists, and trinkets for conventions, ect.

i look up and i see my corkboard covered in all that, so it feels like me. like i'm already pouring everything i have into my comic, why not this? also, red string murder board. thematically appropriate, and similar to the one omen has. expecially fitting since they appear end of chapter two bonus pages, which is where issue 1 of the physical book ends (not including bonus pages)

anyway would love to hear your thoughts!

more rambling under the cut

keep jumping from task to task. eg started planning the cover. jumped from irl task to task and then got back but then needed to figure out 100% how big the book is page-wise, because spine width

so i go do the bonus pages first but despite me collecting all the stuff for that before i keep finding more. because i have been making pages for 7 years and worked on it for longer with just having them as ocs roatating in my mind

and, yknow, i am not an organised person at the best of times. and over the past 10 years, not much has been the best of times. so you can imagine the chaos i've gone looking through. most of it isn't too recent, because turns out i had a lot more time working to draw when i was still in school. and also right after school. also 2020.and most of it is bad due to me improving my skill over time! which is good but still. going to have to carefully pick out what to use

also unrelated but i want to make one of the exclusive kickstarter print rewards foiled because i just love how they look. specifically i want to do one of tsunami and the foil (silver or holo) being the sparkles his water does because it'd look cool!

[dressycobra7]

My official pinned post

Hi! I initially decided to make a pinned post after hearing about Tumblr potentially going down however I accidentally deleted it so now I’ve decided to make a new one that’s (hopefully) a bit more nicely formatted and looks more clean than the old one

My Cohost: here

My Pillowfort: here

My TikTok: here

My Discord: @ DressyCobra

Btw my Pillowfort and cohost are just potentially like where I’ll go if Tumblr gets deleted or something sooo ya

@cobraisveryhorny also here’s my horny blog if anyone wants to see it. Also please dont go to this blog if you’re a minor. It’s a horny blog and it’s not for you

[amorimato]

made graphs to track my tf progress hehe. Divided per season and phase (based on the collected TPBs)

[livetogether--diealone]

I'm a new fan, why exactly max is worse than the others?

Because i see people claiming about the problematic things he did and ok but what about the others? Because for what i understand charles, lando, carlos, daniel, pierre and others also have done problematic things

I dont like max, but this feels a bit like hypocrisy to me

Except for Charles I don't like the others too so, also from my side of things people who don't like max tend to not like these other ones too

Why is he worse though, look sometimes it might be a personal thing, like he just feels worse, but except from the nodding at the racism towards lewis from his team, using slurs and not aknowledging it, the nepo baby turbo fascist girlfriend, he's just so bland? And he seems not to respect the legacy he's carrying, he doesn't enjoy winning, he doesn't enjoy racing other people, he's just a big eww to me

I can't tell why people would like the others too, i don't like Carlos, i don't like Pierre (used to but he now gives me the ick), I liked Lando but he got sour at some point; for Charles because I do like him, his most problematic thing were his comments on blm which were ignorant and unwarranted as i've said other times, but it did look like it did stem from being an rich white guy living in a bubble, and he still strikes me as respectful toward Lewis if things were to change for the worst i will take my leave from him. And if other things happened i truly am not aware

[ginkovskij]

gin, we need your critical opinion about megalopolis. was it really that bad?

i mean.

is it unwatchable? no. but also it is not good for sure. would love for it to be a case of "so bad it circles back being somehow good", but unfortunately no, becasue in order to achieve such a thing coppola should have gone camp and embraced the style instead of taking himself too seriously.

there are. ideas. that considered by themselves sort of make sense if you are desperate to find sense in this insanity of a movie, but whether within or without context for the large part they remain disjointed. and are anyway very cringe at core. i don't know how to put it kindly but the script just sucks. and choices were made.

[sunnykeysmash]

[fearandhatred]

I HAVE FINALLY. finished the first chapter of my fic. now just to decide whether or not to publish it

[taegularities]

okay y'all, two things !!

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ONE: i want to try and host an ask/drabble game night next weekend (mainly cmi-themed, but send them for any fic)!! i know they don't always work, but i miss the chaos and wanna give this one a try. promise it'll be fun!! :D

for the asks, you can send as many as you want. as i always say 💅 spam me <3

and regarding drabbles – try to keep your request brief; i will do them in bullet point format!! send as many as you want, and i shall see how many i can do <3

i'll make an official post next week, but you can send them in already if you want!! i shall start next weekend.

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TWO: you can join my taglist here! just wanted to remind you that you don't need to fill out the form more than once. i usually check the form every now and then and definitely before i post a fic – if i didn't tag you, it's bc tumblr's not letting me. check your settings in that case!!

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love you <3